Why do children steal? This question is being considered not only by parents, but also by many specialists in psychology and pedagogy. As a rule, such episodes begin to appear when the concepts of "good" and "bad" are not sufficiently established in the child's mind. I liked the toy - I took it without demand, envied that another child has something very interesting - this something can be stolen. At such a time the child, as a rule, does not think about the punishability of his act, and even that he hardly thinks about it. And it's good if such moments quickly managed to notice and explain to the kid that it's impossible to do so. But what if the child steals money? This is not only a big trouble, but also a real tragedy for the family. Let's understand the reasons for this behavior and try to find a way out of this situation.
Why does a child steal money?
First of all, the reason that a child steals money from his parents, should be sought in the family itself. Psychologists tirelessly repeat - the environment has the most direct impact on the behavior and development of the child. Theft as a reaction to improper upbringing can arise for the following reasons:
- inconsistency of the actions of parents, when the father, for example, forbids something, and the mother allows;
- lack of logical sequence in education. For example, when in a good mood parents turn a blind eye to misconduct, and later for the same behavior are punished;
- pampering of the child and permitting permissiveness. This happens when the child is the only one in the family and makes an idol out of him. It can grow with the thought that it is unique in its kind, the best and the only one. In this case, he sincerely does not understand why he can not take something for himself;
- control the actions of the child and his life. Some parents do not give their child any freedom, and the child in response begins to resist and commits acts that are condemned by adults.
Kleptomania in children can be caused by other reasons:
- Strong desire to possess any thing with which the kid can not cope on his own. Suppose that he has long dreamed of this particular thing, and such a thing as "someone else's" is still unknown to him. He hides the coveted thing and takes it home. A thief should not be called. It is better to explain to him the meaning of such concepts as "not yours" and "not touching".
- If parents take away from work things that are "badly lying" and this occurs in front of the child, then do not be surprised if the child also began to steal everything that comes to hand. Children copy their parents, and this is worth remembering.
- A child can steal a thing to make a gift to parents. The reason here also lies in the misunderstanding that theft is bad.
- Children's kleptomania often becomes a consequence of the desire to attract attention. And not only parents, but also peers. If any thing is very much appreciated in the environment of the baby, then he will do everything to have it, without thinking about the consequences
- Theft of money may be due to the lack of funds for pocket expenses. For example, if some parents give their children a small amount, while others refuse money, then they can start stealing finances to meet their needs.
What if the child steals?
Whatever the reason for kleptomania, any parent thinks about what to do if a son or daughter steals money. In this situation, a lot depends on the behavior of the parents. The more tactful the attitude towards the arising trouble, the sooner it will be resolved. So, some tips how to wean a child to steal money:
- Aggression in any of its manifestations is absolutely unacceptable! If the child refused to admit his guilt, you do not have to hang a stigma on him. Better quietly, confidentially and without threats to find out whether he took what he does not own
- Do not make the child feel guilty. Do not compare it with other children and say that they are all beautiful offspring, and he alone shames his parents, etc.
- Do not discuss the situation with outsiders and with the child.
- After the deed was discussed with the family, it is better to forget the offense of the child and not return to it. Otherwise, this experience will be fixed in the child's memory
- If your child was seen for another bad act, you do not need to remember the case of his theft, which has nothing to do with what happened at the moment.
- If your family has seen a case of disappearing finances, do not immediately panic, shout at the whole world that the child steals money and ask what to do with others. Remember that you yourself could provoke such behavior. Before you stop the theft, make sure that you have facts and evidence. Even if you punished the child for his misconduct, be sure to tell him that you love him, but his behavior has upset you. Invite your child to find a way out of the situation together.
What if the teen steals money?
Often parents do not know what to do if a teenager steals. After all, children at this age become withdrawn and do not want to let their loved ones into their lives. In this case, it is necessary to understand in what environment the child is. He could get into a bad company or become addicted to someone from peers. Ask to tell you about what is happening. Let for this it is necessary to try for a long time to reach the heart of an adult child. The main thing that he understood - parents can be trusted and just so punishing him no one will.
Trust is the most important foundation on which a harmonious personality is built. Do not solve such questions with screams and scandals. Learn to communicate with your child, teach him how to handle money and finance him when he needs it. And then many problems can be avoided even at the very beginning of their inception.