Love is an ambiguous feeling that has different shades and a history of appearance: some compare its occurrence with a "lightning strike", like a sudden flash that lit up life, giving it a new meaning. Others compare love with the germ, which developed over time, turning into a beautiful flower, for the life of which great efforts of both partners were required: attentive relation to each other, joint overcoming of obstacles and psychological work on oneself.
Despite these cardinally different views, all kinds of love have a common feature: this is a fragile and unpredictable feeling whose disappearance and occurrence can not be predicted. Therefore, many worry about how to keep love for life, given all the unpredictable twists of fate that can both strengthen it, and bring it to nothing.
How to keep love from a distance?
If the appearance of love can be associated with a fatality that can not be influenced, then it is possible to prolong this life by its own will. Perhaps in the most fragile position is love at a distance. How to save love, in the first place, should prompt the heart, but there are some tricks that are universal for all. Since here we are talking about love, not relationships, we will concentrate on the inner state of the lover:
- hope of reunion. There is also unrequited love, which lasts for decades, when a person does not hope that he will one day unite with his beloved. However, in most cases, people in order to preserve this feeling, you need to know that one day a loved one will be near;
- happy past or future. If people were happy before parting, then sometimes you need to turn to these memories, supporting "in tonus" light image of the object of adoration. If there is no joint past, then you need to include imagination and turn to the future: imagine how well it will be together, make plans, and live as if the loved one is already around. But here there is a risk of getting bogged down in empty illusions, so it is not necessary to be in such states for too long.
How to keep love in a marriage?
Unfortunately, divorce is not uncommon in our time: it is connected with everyday problems, when all the energy of the partners is spent on their solution, and with the fact that the mystery that stimulated the romantic feeling, and, of course, with the time that changes all. If you compare two people in the present, and then look back at the past, and compare them, then it is likely that they will be different people. From the words "I love you" to the question "how to keep the love of a husband" lies about five years: the couple marries, the children appear, everything changes except for the form of relations. Therefore, in order to learn how to preserve love in the family, you must first pay attention to the relationship, not feelings:
- add variety. The advice seems banal, but without it anywhere: if you wallow in "bytovuhe", then even the strongest love evaporates: it simply will not have a place in your hearts. For pots and cares, such as "doing repairs in the bathroom," there is no time to notice your love for someone. Therefore, let your house not be ideal, but to support feelings at the proper level it is necessary: who needs a clean apartment without happiness in it?
- appearance. Age changes should not be an excuse to forget about the attractive appearance. Both men and women "love" with eyes, ears and touch, so the couple should always look nice, smell good and have an interesting topic for conversation, so as not to disgust each other.
- constant changes in personality. In order for a husband and wife to show interest in each other, they need to show interest in themselves. Find a hobby, change, learn new things, and most importantly - do not forget to share it with a partner.
How to preserve love in extramarital relationships?
The "Achilles' heel" of long extramarital relations is that they do not come to a logical conclusion - the official union and the birth of children. Therefore, the answer to the question "How to preserve feelings in such relations?" In this case is quite simple: you need to continue to develop them. Psychologically, get closer, formalize a marriage, and then raise children. Relationships that have "frozen" at a certain stage, have a big risk of ending because the partners subconsciously will consider their feelings fruitless, which lead to nothing.
How to strengthen love?
Psychologists offer several tips on how to save and make love stronger:
- help the partner develop positive qualities;
- Constantly communicate with each other, establishing emotional intimacy;
- try to do housework together: starting from the preparation of dinner and ending with the choice of tiled edging;
- Do not try to radically change each other: accept love as it is. Remember what happened to the old woman from the fairy tale about the fisherman and the fish: she stayed at the broken trough when she constantly demanded, wanting more. Learn to appreciate what you have;
- organize a common leisure, which will bring joy to both.
To doubt the effectiveness of these councils is not necessary, so instead of thinking how not to lose love, get down to business: love, and enjoy this feeling, and then it will not get anywhere from you.