"We tend to believe those we do not know, because they never deceived us," said the English critic and poet Samuel Johnson. What a true, but sad statement!
Distrust of men arises for various reasons:
- as a result of unsuccessful experience (including your parents, friends and acquaintances). Even a small lie later gives rise to great mistrust;
- as a result of a strong passion, knocking a person out of the usual rut. Feelings are tense, you put on your person all your secret dreams and desires, mentally giving it those qualities that it does not have. Disillusionment in one gives rise to mistrust in the rest;
- because of the nature of education. If as a child you were brought up with suspicion and initial aggression to the world around you, it's no wonder that, confronted with disappointment, you take it for granted as part of our world. Mistrust of her husband, most likely, will also initially.
Think: all of the above reasons, one way or another, are reduced to one thing - you do not trust yourself and the world around you.
How to get rid of mistrust?
Love and mistrust can live in your heart for a very short time. It's like putting a python and guinea pig into one terrarium. Sooner or later the python will swallow the animal. But is it necessary to keep a python in your heart, even if it is not necessary to feed it (after all, distrust generates distrust).
- Learn to trust. Everything. Distrust (in relationships and in life, in general) will not save you. Not trusting her husband, you automatically put limits on the feeling that could be boundless - love. Try to convey to your mind that distrust is useless;
- Learn to love yourself. You deserve the best. Including - and life without mistrust;
- speak the truth. Do not be afraid to show your feelings, because misunderstanding often leads to distrust;
- Do not idealize other people, let them be what they are.
- try to find the roots of your distrust. Scroll through the mind of the experience of your life and the lives of your parents. Find a sore point and ... accept betrayal or disappointment. As a fact. It was, the past can not be corrected. You can only change your attitude to this fact. Forgive all participants in the situation. Sometimes this requires the help of a professional.
And remember: distrust in a relationship is not an inoculation against possible disappointments. Allow yourself to love in full force!