It is not a secret for anyone that the formation of a full-fledged personality in a child depends on upbringing. And the more their parents put their energy and attention into the child, the more likely that he will grow up to be a respectable person. However, at all times, parents have committed, and will, make quite typical mistakes. The reason here may be a lack of time, and the wrong stereotypes, which in turn were instilled in us by the older generation. So what are the features of family education? Let's analyze them and remember them so as not to repeat mistakes of others.
Problems of Family Education
Let's start with the most common misconceptions that guide many parents. Mistakes of family education is the main answer to the question why a child who grew up, it would seem, in a decent family, does not justify expectations and to the horror of parents fights at the hands. So, let's consider the most frequent of them:
- Misunderstanding of the individuality of the child and his character. If, for example, a child is phlegmatic by type of person, he will do everything slowly and sedately. In this case, the mother, who is a choleric, will be annoyed, call him a "crook", etc.
- Rejection. Such an attitude is possible if the child was not wanted or was born of the "wrong" sex that the parents wanted. In this case, parents do not accept the child and his personality. Attitude towards him can be condoning (neglect). Also, the rejection is manifested in the fact that the child is given to relatives or a nanny for education, preventing proper formation of emotional attachment.
- The discrepancy between parents' expectations of who the child actually becomes. The most common mistake: "I WANT", "it MUST be that and that". In this case, the individual characteristics of the child are ignored and suppressed.
- Affectiveness. It manifests itself in the splashing out on the child of discontent, irritation, screaming. The more parents raise their voice, the more the child is excited or vice versa.
- Anxiety is an unnecessary concern for a child, a hyperope. It leads to the suppression of the child's independence, protecting him from the so-called dangers and difficulties in life. As a result, the child will grow insecure and self-dependent.
- Dominance - manifested in the desire to subordinate the child to his will, the demand for unconditional subordination, constant control over his actions. It is also characterized by physical and moral punishments for any misconduct. As a result, the child grows nervous and embittered. Respect for parents is often replaced by a sense of fear of them.
The general rules of family upbringing of the child do not accept such mistakes. Do not forget that a full-fledged family is the presence of two parents, each of which brings something new and useful to the child's life. The role of the mother in family education is the unconditional acceptance of the child and his individuality, the protection of his health, both moral and physical. Whatever happens in the life of the growing up person, the mother must always provide support and share the interesting of her child. The role of the father in family education is also important. He must provide the offspring with a sense of security. The father is the person who is an idol for the child and an example for imitation. For toddlers, this is often the personification of strength and masculinity, and therefore the authority of the pope must in no case be questioned. These are the foundations of family education. But such knowledge is still not enough for your child to grow a full-fledged adequate personality.
Methods of Family Education
Achieve a harmonious development of the child can be using the following common and proven methods of family education:
- persuasion - the formation in the child of a position of agreement with the requirements presented to him by means of advice, suggestion and explanation;
- encouragement - the use of praise or gifts to awaken the child's desire to form certain qualities and properties;
- coercion (punishment) - the use of funds that do not degrade a child's dignity in order to form a rejection of unwanted
actions and actions; - joint activity - participation of both parents in various educational activities. For example, joint trips to the zoo, museum or joint trips to nature.
The psychology of family education in each married couple is individual. If you have a family that serves as an example and a model for the development of the child, do not hesitate to ask what their family education is built on. In any case, whatever methods, secrets and rules you use - they should only be of use. The main thing is for your child to grow up in an atmosphere of mutual love and mutual understanding.