Every person's life consists not only of joy and happy moments, but also sad events, disappointments, diseases and losses. To accept everything that happens, you need willpower , you need to adequately see and perceive the situation. In psychology, there are five stages in the adoption of the inevitable, through which everyone passes who has a difficult period in his life.
These stages were developed by the American psychologist Elizabeth Kubler-Ross, who was interested in the theme of death since childhood and was looking for the right way to die. Later, she spent a lot of time with deadly sick dying people, helping them psychologically, listening to their confessions, etc. In 1969, she wrote a book about "Death and Dying," which became a bestseller in her country and from which readers learned about the five stages of the death, as well as other inevitable and terrible events in life. And they relate not only to the dying person or the person who is in a difficult situation, but also to his relatives who are experiencing this situation with him.
5 steps in making the inevitable
These include:
- Denial . A person refuses to believe that this is happening with him, and hopes that this terrible dream will ever end. If it is a question of a fatal diagnosis, then he believes it to be a mistake and is looking for other clinics and doctors to refute it. Close people support the suffering in everything, because they, too, refuse to believe in the inevitable end. Often they just miss the time, postponing the necessary treatment and visiting babushka-fortune tellers, psychics, are treated by phytotherapeutists, etc. The brain of a sick person can not perceive information about the inevitability of the end of life.
- Anger . At the second stage of acceptance of the inevitable person excruciates burning an insult and self-pity. Some just go into a rage and all the time they ask: "Why me? Why did this happen to me? "Close people and everyone else, especially doctors, become the most terrible enemies who do not want to understand, do not want to heal, do not want to listen, etc. It is at this stage that a person can quarrel with all his relatives and go to write complaints about doctors. He is annoyed by all - laughing healthy people, children and parents who continue to live and solve their problems that do not concern him.
- Bargaining or bargaining . On 3 of the 5 steps of making the inevitable person try to negotiate with God himself or other higher powers. In his prayers, he promises him that he will correct himself, do this or that, in return for health or other important benefit for him. It is during this period that many begin to engage in charity, they are in a hurry to do good deeds and have time to do at least a little in this life. Some have their own signs, for example, if a leaf from a tree falls to its feet with the upper side, then good news is waiting, and if it is bad, then the bottom one.
- Depression . At 4 stages of acceptance of the inevitable person falls into depression . His hands drop, apathy and indifference to everything appear. A person loses the meaning of life and can make attempts at suicide. The close ones also get tired of fighting, although they may not give the appearance.
- Acceptance . At the last stage, a person accepts the inevitable, accepts it. Deadly sick people calmly wait for the finals and even pray for an early death. They begin to ask forgiveness from their relatives, realizing that the end is near. In the case of other tragic events not related to death, life enters its usual course. Calms down and loved ones, realizing that nothing can be changed already and everything that could be done has already been done.
I must say that not all stages take place in this order. Their sequence may vary, and duration depends on the strength of the psyche.